Solution

Being the most popular blog writer in Finland (having at least 6 verified dedicated followers) and a somewhat sane person nevertheless (possessing hardly any delusions of grandeur, for example), I'm often called in, by the Finnish government, to solve severe domestic and/or international emergencies.

As is the case today with the economic situation in Greece. The prime minister of Finland (and a very dear friend of mine) lately asked me to find a solution to this severe crisis, that is actually threatening the very basis of EU, or whatever. So, here's my proposition.

First, some background.

Greek culture, philosophy, literature, music, sports and cuisine has been renowned for millenia. The mediterranean climate is very nice.

Finland has been populated by humans for several centuries, could also be more, it's hard to tell because no-one cares. The people have always lived in huts and tents without chimneys (so the smoke from the fire comes in), in arctic conditions, surviving mostly on bark and pinecones, and occasionally on small forest animals, if they're lucky. Favourite pastimes in Finland consist of drinking moonshine and battering peers with birch logs. Oh yeah, and in the recent years there's been the success story of Finnish hi-tech and Nokia.

So, it seems to me, that the Greek have had it easy, sipping wine and eating gyros by the mediterranean sea, for thousands of years, and now they're screwed. Meanwhile, we, the Finnish, have suffered miserably, but somehow we're doing ok, financially.

My proposition is simple: let's swap countries. The Greek move to Finland, the Finnish move to Greece. In addition, the Greek get to keep Nokia so they can sell it to pay for their huge national debt. This OK by you, Matti?

Man, I can't wait to get to the seaside, to lift my feet up and have some gyros and Retsina. I'm totally sick of having pinecones for breakfast, then skiing to work in the -42°C frost, while being chased by a hungry pack of wolves, each morning.